Trade Deadline 2012: Some Suggestions

Posted: March 5, 2012 in Uncategorized
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Deadline Day is traditionally when clubs make exciting last-minute deals. Or when talented players demand out of Toronto.

As the NBA trade deadline approaches, teams are once again in wheeling-and-dealing mode: which players will move in search of a championship? Which owners will show enough knowledge of basketball chemistry to find the perfect fit? Which teams will find the missing piece that will propel them in the right direction as the playoffs loom on the horizon?

Since words like “playoffs”, “championship”, and sometimes even “basketball” aren’t things that generally come to mind when one ponders the Toronto Raptors, Deadline Day doesn’t quite carry the same excitement that it would in a city where the local team is trying to build a contender.

But that doesn’t mean we shouldn’t have some fun speculating about what might happen this March 15th. So here, for my own amusement and yours, is a list of some trades that I think might work out in the Raptors’ favour.

Trade Suggestion #1: Andrea Bargnani for David Letterman

This one works out for everybody. Think about it: Letterman spends his evenings sitting on the side, wearing a suit, watching Paul Schaeffer play. Bargnani spends his evenings sitting on the side, wearing a suit, watching the Raptors play. They’ve got all the experience they need to do each other’s jobs! Plus, Dave could lighten things up when coach Casey gets all heavy with his whole “defense” thing.

Late Night host David Letterman would be a great fit; as you can see here, he's already got more experience touching trophies than most Raptors.


Trade Suggestion #2: Aaron Gray for Chuck Swirsky

Aaron Gray is a reminder of everything that’s wrong with the current Raptors. I love the guy. He tries hard. But he’s oafish, awkward, and has trouble making shots from further out than 6 inches.

Chuck Swirsky, on the other hand, is a reminder of better days. I think having The Swirsk at centre would really liven things up; he’s got a great low-post game, a shiny head, and an affinity for salami and cheese. This trade would be sick, wicked, and nasty.


Trade Suggestion #3: Leandro Barbosa for a Loonie.

Why? Simple. A loonie is tough, well-rounded, and…wait for it…it’s good for four quarters!

Barbosa for a dollar: a trade that just makes cents. (Sorry.)

  1. […] last year’s trade deadline, there wasn’t much happening in Raptorville. Sure, they traded Barbosa, but I’m pretty […]

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