In recent Raptor games, incidents away from play have been just as interesting as the games themselves. A few days ago there was Matt Devlin’s bizarre encounter with rapper Wale.
And then last night, an unexpected, overweight, 15-minutes-of-famer appeared briefly on the hardwood at the ACC. But enough about Young MC’s halftime performance.
It was during the fourth quarter of a hard-fought, scrappy game that Devin Hicks burst onto the court during a time-out. But this wasn’t just some spur of the moment, alcohol-fuelled impulse. This was a pilgrimmage. This was a carefully-planned fulfillment of a bucket-list dream. Hicks spent several hours pre-Tweeting about how he was getting all excited about his upcoming exploits. His homemade t-shirt had “Let’s Go Raps” scrawled on the front, and “Bucket List” on the back.
Hicks apparently spent the night in jail, no doubt paid a hefty fine, and according to his Twitter feed, has been banned from the ACC for a year. His first tweet after leaving jail was hashtagged “#illbeback”, which leaves me wondering what Mr. Hicks has planned for an encore when he’s allowed back to the ACC in a year’s time.
Well, Mr. Hicks, if you’re out there, here are some tips for your next unscheduled appearance:
- Outsource the t-shirt making. Seriously. If you had been looking forward to your court invasion for weeks, you need to come with something better than sharpie on a white undershirt.
- Learn some dance moves. Once you reached mid-court, I was excited to see what you had in store for us. Cartwheels? Harlem shake? Moonwalk? Maybe a bit of nudity? But no; you just ran around a bit, looking excited to be there, but a bit confused as to what to do. We get that every night with Aaron Gray. Give us something original!
- Make a sign. If you’ve got 18,000 eyes looking your way, give them a message. Nobody past the front row could read your shirt. How about a sign? Maybe with some kind of inflammatory Colangelo-related catchphrase on it.
- Play to the crowd. Give them some physical comedy. Maybe the ol’ slip on a banana peel. Or a one-knee proposal to a security guard. Or mime Terrence Ross’ winning dunk. Every great prank has a punchline, and you need to find yours.