Posts Tagged ‘Raptors Review’

Remember just a short while ago when we thought the Raptors might be able to sneak into the 8th spot? Ah, those were the days. (Photo:

Remember just a short while ago when we thought the Raptors might be able to sneak into the 8th spot? Ah, those were the days. (Photo:

Record:  26-44 (3-7 over the past 10)

Low point: Watching a late-game lead turn into another overtime loss, this time against the Lakers, on March 8th.

High point: Alan Anderson tying a team record for most points in a quarter (20) against the Knicks on March 22nd.

Stuff I’ve Noticed:

  • Sebastian Telfair looks like Caron Butler’s mini-me.
  • On most nights, Rudy Gay’s shooting percentage would make a reasonable batting average.
  • Now that we’ve entered the “who cares” part of the season, losses really don’t seem to bother me anymore, and when someone botches an inbounds pass or airballs a three, it’s almost adorable. Like watching a 4-year-old forget his lines in his kindergarten class version of Hamlet.
Memorable Quote:
“I fell asleep in the second quarter and just when I was settling into my dream where I was playing a tight game of chess with a unicorn, I was awoken to Matt Devlin and Jack Armstrong strongly suggesting what a great player Leo Rautins would make in ‘today’s NBA’.”
-Arsenalist of Raptors Republic, following a brutally boring game against the Bobcats on March 15th.
Watching the Raptors this week felt kind this. (Photo:

Watching the Raptors this week felt kind of…like this. (Photo:

Record:    23-37 (5-5 over the past 10)

Low point: A 90-84 loss to the Wizards, in what may have been the ugliest, most boring game in the NBA this season.

High point: February 22nd vs. the Knicks: two-point win against a top team, Kyle Lowry bobblehead night, halftime performance by Young MC, and some crazy guy runs on court and gets tackled by security. Oh, and 100 points for free pizza. Who could ask for anything more?

Stuff I’ve Noticed:

  • When Aaron Gray shoots, he puts side-spin on the ball. Not making this up. Take a look next time he shoots a free throw.
  • Raptor fans move from “we’re making the playoffs” to “the end is near” faster than any fans in the NBA.
  • The average height of the Raptors’ point guards is about 4’9″.
Memorable Quote:
“I know the Raptors have been succeeding despite his problems, but it’s hard to see what he really adds to a team besides clanking mid-range jumpers.”
-Mike Prada of the Bullets Forever SB Nation Blog, analyzing Rudy Gay.

Needless to say, Amir Johnson left the game after this incident against Golden State on January 28th. He was later seen in the locker room, compulsively washing his face with industrial-strength soap. (Photo:

Record:  18-32  (4-6 over the past 10)

Low point: Saying goodbye to Jose Calderon.

High point: Saying hello to Rudy Gay, as he comes off the bench with 20 points in a 98-73 rout of the Clippers.

Stuff I’ve Noticed:

  • Having John Lucas as your backup point guard is like having a cardboard box as your backup airbag.
  • I’m not sure if Mickael Pietrus used to play for the Raptors, or if I dreamed it.
  • There should be some kind of “handicap” when teams like the Raptors play against top-level teams. Like maybe we get to pick one of their players, and that player has to wear oven mitts for the whole game.
Memorable Quote:
“I’m tired of this. I’m tired of losing games because of missed calls at the end of the game. I know the league’s going to come down on me but I don’t care.”
-Dwayne Casey’s $25 000 comment after losing to the Hawks on January 30th.

Terrence Ross, seen here emerging Alien-style from Amir Johnson’s chest, had a crazy putback dunk against Brooklyn last week. (Photo:

Record:   14-26 (4-6 over the past 10)

Low point: A brutal bench performance agains the Bucks on January 13: Milwaukee’s bench outscore’s Toronto’s 43-7. A 20-point Raptor lead turns into an 11-point loss.

High point: Being on the happy end of back-to-back blowouts of the 76ers and Bobcats.

Stuff I’ve Noticed:

  • Overtime makes me nervous.
  • Quincy Acy might be James Harden’s long-lost (and less talented) twin.
  • I heard someone say that Aaron Gray looks like he doesn’t know what he’s doing when he plays, but I disagree. Sometimes he looks like he knows what he’s supposed to be doing. It’s doing it that’s the problem.
Memorable Quote:
“Those guys are really happy over there. Or they’re just drying their towels.”
-My wife, after watching the Raptors bench celebrate a Terrence Ross 3-pointer against Portland.

Over the holidays, the ghost of failures past visited Demar DeRozan to teach him the true meaning of Christmas. (Photo:

Record:  10-20 (6-4 over the past 10)

Low point: December 10th vs. Portland: 5th straight loss. 11th straight road loss.  Bargnani and Lowry get hurt. Amir Johnson gets ejected. Portland sets an NBA record by going 0-for-20 from three-point land, but still wins by 18. 

High point: Bargnani and Lowry getting injured, allowing the rest of the guys to play like a team and win 5 games in a row for the first time since 1844.

Stuff I’ve Noticed:

  • Valanciunas has got hustle. He’s more energetic in warm-ups than most players are in the actual game.
  • Calderon’s bald spot is now visible from the upper bowl.
  • Once he’s no longer needed as Jonas’ translator, Linas Kleiza has got to go.
Memorable Quote:
“There’s been some slippage, clearly.”
-GM Bryan Colangelo exhibits interesting word choice while analyzing Toronto’s defensive focus.

Coach Casey’s mother always warned him that if he accepted a job coaching the Raptors, his face might get stuck this way. (Photo: Chris Humphreys, USA Today Sports)

Record: 4-16 (1-9 over the past 10)

Low point: Back-to-back 1-point losses against weak teams. (Bobcats and Pistons.)

High point: Welcoming aboard Mickael Pietrus. No disrespect to Dominic McGuire, but that hole at small forward was big enough to drive an Oliver Miller through.

Stuff I’ve Noticed:

  • A fun drinking game for designated drivers: take a drink every time Andrea Bargnani appears remotely interested in the game. You will be stone-cold sober.
  • Speaking of Bargnani, I think Dwane Casey might have sold his soul to Bargs in exchange for guaranteeing him playing time down the stretch, regardless of how he’s playing.
  • If the Spurs can be fined $250 000 for “doing the fans a disservice” by sitting their best players and putting a sub-par team on the court, the Raptors owe the league, by my count, approximately $86 trillion in back payments.
Memorable Quote:
“We’ve got to make basketball plays.”
-Coach Casey after a blown lead in Philadelphia

Kyle Lowry started the 2012-2013 season the same way Bargnani started last year: playing like an all-star, then getting injured. (Photo: Bleacher Report)

Record: 3-7

Low point: Losing Kyle Lowry.

High point: Bouncing back from a heartbreaking triple OT loss at home with a win on the road the next night.

Stuff I’ve Noticed:

  • Alan Anderson plays with hustle. It’s the hustle of someone who’s just been woken up by a fire alarm, but it’s still hustle.
  • The construction at Union Station is making it one of the most unpleasant places to be after a game. The TTC responds to this by adding zero extra staff and opening zero extra entrances on game days.
  • With $40 million, MLSE could have bought a beer for every fan at every home game this season. Just sayin’.
Memorable Quote:
“Rookie Terrence Ross is still learning; Linas Kleiza does nothing to improve the Raptors’ sagging defence; Anderson is reliable but limited; Dominic McGuire is an offensive black hole…Andrea Bargnani has re-established himself as the league’s most enigmatic player; the tough defence that Dwane Casey built last year has not reappeared; rookie centre Jonas Valanciunas is having trouble staying on the floor; Kyle Lowry is nursing an injured ankle.”
-The National Post’s Eric Koreen succinctly summarizes the Raptors’ early-season problems. In other words, everything.